Warning: this is a total mush post. This non-mush girl has become a total mush girl, at least with one person and it is spilling into my writing.
Last night I read this post about fairy tales and the knights we see in real life versus the stories we grew up reading. Some girls grow up with a dad who treats them like a princess. Some of us have quite the opposite in our lives and don’t know to even really expect to be treated like a princess at all. For over 30 years of my life I scoffed at the whole princess and fairy tale thing. Not because I thought it was stupid, but because I was jealous of those who had it…. not the whole prince coming to save me thing… the having someone treat you like you are incredibly precious.
After my divorce my brother (by soul, not by blood) set out on a task of teaching me what he was teaching his daughters… that I should be treated like a princess (even if I am more the princess who is out digging in the garden or climbing a tree). My brother repeatedly told me that I deserved my own fairy tale and a man who would support and appreciate me and whose actions would show it. I am hard-headed and repeatedly made it clear that I didn’t believe it was possible and that I was planning on a life without that. As far as I was concerned it was not in the cards for me. Granted, deep inside there was a tiny flicker of hope, but it was buried so deep that nobody could see it (sometimes even I could not see it).
Years went by and one day the universe conspired to put someone into my life who saw that little flicker and built that little flame up into a full on fire in my soul. It’s not the typical Cinderella fairy tale and that is more than okay with me. Because it is our fairy tale. He doesn’t need to wear the armor of a knight or the garb of a prince because his soul is the soul of the bravest of knights. So my fairy tale consists of random Disney adventures, wandering book stores, eating delicious cheeseburgers, holding hands at every moment we can, and having silly and serious conversations. It consists of someone who looks at me as if I am made of magic and who also won’t let me be less than the best version of me. You know what?? I respect the hell out of him for many reasons and the way he holds me accountable to being 100% authentically me and calls me out when I step away from that is a big part of that respect.
Life is far from perfect and there are many things that can frustrate the hell out of me (traffic and most people), but I know that even at the moments that it seems like everything is a mess and I can’t see my way out of it that this man is quick to be the knight who guides me through it. Not to save me because I cannot save myself, but to remind me of who I am and that I am not alone. Friends, I don’t need the castle or the servants or any other trappings of the typical fairy tale. I have something even better. Material things can be nice, but what really makes for the fairy tale (at least for me) is knowing that he has my back and that we have each other in this crazy world.
Rewrite the fairy tale!